I’m writing my post for The Motherhood Collective blog today; the day it is due. That has been happening a lot lately. Meeting deadlines just in the nick of time (though more often late). It’s been this way for a while. I feel like I am moving through a fog. And the crazy thing is, I can’t even blame it on the whole newborn/lack of sleep thing. My daughters are 5 and 3 and are great kids. The oldest goes to school in the mornings and my younger one entertains herself remarkably well. They get themselves ready for bed and sleep through the night. So what is my problem?
Yes, I am 20 weeks pregnant with my third but that hardly seems to be enough to cause this overwhelming haze. I have a great support system. My in-laws live in town and I have a community of women who are willing to reach out and pitch in if I need anything. And yet I feel like I am drowning and I don’t know why.
Truth be told, I don’t even know why I am sharing this, except that my husband encouraged me to. In the day and age of Pinterest, blogs, Facebook, and various other forms of social media, it is so easy to feel like we are the only ones who are hurting. We convince ourselves we are the only ones who are overwhelmed by the everyday stuff and feel horribly guilty for feeling that way. This isn’t my proudest post. I doubt I will be posting the link to it on my facebook for all the world to see. But I am putting my pride aside for a few moments because my gut says there is at least one other mama out there who needs to know that it’s ok. That sometimes just life itself feels overwhelming. That it doesn’t last. It gets better. Or maybe I’m writing because I, myself, need to hear that.