We're starting a new series here at TMC entitled, "Mom Confessions". Basically, it's a fun, informal way for us all to gain some solidarity in this motherhood journey, because we all know there are days we could use some! In this, our first installment, we share some holiday-themed confessions, provided by some of the leadership team, past and present.
Dear Santa, I am writing to request that you send some holiday cheer (i.e., kindness and pity) to a tired, overworked single mom this year. I have been very good all year long! (Ok, ok...I really haven't been that great, but based on the behavior of my children and co-workers alone, I think I'm still in the running.)
If you would be so kind, please bring me the following (wrapped and topped with a big red bow is optional, but would be a nice touch):
A big delicious bottle of Bailey's (i.e., Mommy's "chocolate milk"). You know, the one with a handle that requires a shopping cart at the liquor store. I promise to only use it medicinally.
72 hours of uninterrupted sleep. The only physical and mental recuperation appropriate for me at this time needs to mimic hibernation. During this time, I plan to wear my most hideous sweatsuit with legs unshaven and face void of makeup, curled in the fetal position on my sofa under a heavy blanket spooning my TV remote. I know babysitting my children for the weekend is a lot to ask, but I am not opposed to you assigning them to hard, manual "elf" labor. Trust me, they deserve it.
A man. A handsome, single, attractive man who loves me, my children and my creepy collection of Christmas nutcrackers. A man who finds my small, filthy, toy-ridden home "charming." A man who's sensitive but strong, and enjoys me bossing him around from time to time. A man whose hobbies include vacuuming, small home improvement projects, cleaning toilets and car-pooling. A man with the libido of a twenty year old, despite roaming the hallways all night tending to crying babies, requests for water, and middle of the night bathroom runs. (Please note: I will gladly substitute a maid and a one-night stand for the gentleman referenced above. Come to think of it, I think I would prefer the maid and the one-night stand. I don't have the strength to be witty and full of enthralling conversation most days.)
Thanks so much for your abundance of goodwill and joy. You're the man. Seriously, I mean it.
Sincerely, Missy xoxo